Choonie-Moonies Save the Aliens - Part 1 and Part 2

Howdy, y'all. This is a two-part tale in the continuing adventures of the Choonie-Moonies, mythical creatures of the forests and guardians of the land, who were rediscovered by Puppy and Coyote McDonut in the Chernobyl Zone during a visit with their good friends, the Wolves of Chernobyl. Now they are master bakers at Snoop McDonuts, that Temple of Snacks in Kiev, Ukraine. And their legend marches on. The author is Misha McDonut ( Rock Modo ). 

                                                 Choonie-Moonies Save the Aliens

     It has been an unsettled summer in the old country. Strange events have rattled the few inhabitants of the forbidden zone. So unusual have the sightings been, that rumors have permeated the big city and have been discussed at length by patrons in the World Famous Snoop McDonuts Café. Here, the Choonie-Moonies are valued workers and treasured members of the Snoop McDonut household. They were once ancient guardians of the forest, so these events fill them with unshakeable curiosity. They whisper amongst themselves with barely contained excitement whenever there is a spare moment. That is not often in this house of world famous snacks. “Who could it be? With so many reports, some of it must be true. Have our old friends survived the onslaught of humans? Have they finally emerged in this blessed sanctuary? What could it be? Flashing lights and flying objects. This does not sound like any of our old colleagues. But perhaps they have created new magic in all these intervening centuries? After all, who could have imagined those many years ago that we would be bakers of Nobel Prize winning doughnuts? We must investigate my brothers. Let us ask Annie and Misha for a little time. The holiday is over and I am sure that the children have had their fill of delicious McDonuts for now.”

     Annie has noticed the unrest in her normally calm Choonies and is quick to ask, “What is it my darlings? You seem so perplexed. Do you need a holiday? It has been such a busy summer for all of us and we could not have done this without you. Just ask and we will arrange something.” Of course, every Choonie answers at once in an explosion of babel, as they usually do. “Babble, babble, babble. Blah, blah, blah, blah. Gaack, gaack, gaack,” says this wild bunch.” “Ha, ha, ha. Such silly ones! One at a time please. What delights you are Choonies.” Excited Choonie-Moonies are a wonder to behold! “Annie, Annie, Annie! Have you heard the news? It appears that some of the ancient ones are returning to the forbidden zone. We must know. It is so long since we have talked to our old friends. Please Annie, please. We will work extra hard when we return.” “Oh Choonies. You are the hardest workers ever. Go and search for the lost ones. Take what time you need my dears. This evening will be quiet. You must return to the house and begin your packing. It is wild country. All I ask is that you prepare well.” “Yippeee! Hooray for Annie. Let us get to it lads. This is wonderful!”

      And a mad little fur frenzy tumbles out the door and into the bus. Such a kafluffle! They can’t help themselves. It has been 300 years since they last talked with their magic brethren. Good luck Choonies! At last the bus arrives near the McDonut house. It is straight in the door and to the closet to find their sturdy packs and sleeping bags. Not even a snack upon their return. They must be very excited! It is late for kittens, so they are already napping. But Puppy and Coyote have noticed the blaze of activity. “Why so busy Choonies? Goodness. What are you packing?” “There are strange disturbances in the country around Chernobyl and we must investigate. It is quite a mystery.” “Us too! Us too! Arooooooooh!” “No Puppy. No Coyote. This might be dangerous and we need you to take care of Annie and Misha.” “What if it is aliens?” barks Coyote. “Puppy and I were attacked by aliens at the mall. It was very scary.” “Coyote, it was balloons.” “Hah. You see what a brave one this Puppy is. Balloons! We were almost for it that time, yet Puppy dismisses it like nothing happened. Such a good friend you are Puppy.” “Oh yes,” agree the Choonies. “Puppy is a little dog with a big heart. Besides, my curious little pups. It is a voyage to the unknown and we must pack well. Our motorcycles will be stuffed.  Next time Puppies, we will go as a family, but for now we are on a quest. Early tomorrow we will journey to the very heart of the wilderness and confront this mystery.”

     Now Choonie-Moonies are forever tied to the land as ancient creatures of the forest. But they have mastered modern technology and their mini motorcycles are marvels of construction. At dawn, the Choonies are up and packed. On go their little leather motorcycle suits with the crests that proudly state, “I’m a Choonie-Moonie.” There is excitement on the streets as this merry band thunders toward the edge of the city. Most citizens know of the legend and nothing more, so they savor the privilege of spying Choonie-Moonies in all their splendor. “We will ride until we reach the brook in the heart of the wolves’ territory. There we will consult with our friends before we form the mystical circle and determine the very center of this disturbance.” Choonie-Moonies can brave the most extreme conditions. They were born at a time when the world was a savage and unpredictable mistress and they are immune to most of the weaknesses we humans must bear. The lads boldly turn into the forbidden zone and roar onward. The tough roads are no match for Choonie-Moonies on a mission. Few would dare to stop by the peaceful brook in the meadow at the heart of wolf country. But it is they whom they seek. The Choonies remove their helmets, throw their heads in the air and utter their mournful cry, “Khaboooooga, khaboooooga, khaboooooga, wheeeeeeeeeeee!” All forest creatures instinctively know the Choonie-Moonie summons and the citizens are quick to assemble. “Greetings ancient friends. We have travelled here to investigate the mysterious disturbances that have caused so much consternation. Who among you have witnessed these things?” Woodchuck is first to speak, “They appeared around the deserted human city. While they are somewhat interesting, I did not smell yummy snacks, so I have not bothered to check. My eyes aren’t the best, but what a nose I have for snacks!” “Thank you woodchuck.” “It is certainly in our territory and we normally do not tolerate invaders,” the wolves reply.  But we do not know what it is. It has been no bother so far. The lights were so bright that we could not get close. I hope it is not a plague of Choonie-Moonies……hehehehe.” “You had best pray that it is not the return of the Wolfbane kin, you scoundrels,” grumble the Choonies. They are really friends, but 1,000 years of association has made them comfortable with this banter. “Thank you friends. We will scout ahead today, but if we may camp here for the night, we will move in early tomorrow and determine which scoundrels are behind this nonsense.” “Of course Choonies. We will tell all animals that you have free passage and are not to be disturbed. It is best for all of us that this matter is concluded.” “Thank you everyone. May your puppies play well and your supper be especially tasty,” chant the Choonies.  “We will make camp and then sneak up on the deserted city.” There are few forest matters that the Choonies have not dealt with over the centuries. With a sturdy camp assembled by the brook, the band of brothers slither through the underbrush until they reach a high point overlooking the center of the city. Nothing will escape their watch! But the grass is so soft and the sun is so warm. Soon every Choonie is snoring contentedly. But what is this? Little pokes bring Frumpbart instantly alert, sort of. “Was ist das?”

     “Bleep, glork. Bleep glork. Blurgle, glurgle, sklurgle,” is what the Choonies hear. What are these marvels? Little ones in tiny spacesuits just like those the Choonies wore when they were famous cosmonauts. Choonies recognize most of the languages of the Earth and realize immediately, “Aliens! Puppy and Coyote were right. How did those rascals know?” They begin babbling at once as they always do when they are excited. Meanwhile, the aliens have tuned their translators, but cannot understand a word. “What language are these silly ones speaking? Make sense you scoundrels!” “Gaaack! Scoundrels! We are Choonie-Moonies, ancient guardians of these forests. Who are you and why do you invade this sanctuary?” “Please, please. We do not invade. We were merely observing, but a great force disrupted our craft and we crashed.” “Oh yes. That silly reactor. What villains these humans are! Can you still fly?” “We must make repairs, but we cannot within the boundaries of this cursed thing.” “Hmmmmm. We know of a cave where you can camp until we can move your machine. Are you hungry? We have snacks.” “Goodness. Are those McDonuts? They are famous throughout the Cosmos.” “Yes aliens. We are bakers of McDonuts. Try our delicious treat.” “Yuuuuummmmy! It was worth the long journey to taste this legend. And to meet makers of McDonuts. This is a story we will tell when we arrive home.”

      “Show us your craft little ones. We were once cosmonauts and we soared free of this planet in our time. Perhaps we can help?” There on a side street in a little park looking quite sorry for itself is their little pale blue saucer. “Oh, but it is only a tiny one. The craft we rode into the darkness were great thundering beasts. We are very strong for little furry ones. We have come prepared for the wilderness and have ropes in our packs. Let us bring your spaceship to the cave where you can hide until we return better prepared. Do not fear. We will have the wolves protect you from trespassers. We must help. It is the code of space. And we will leave plenty of McDonuts so that the wait will be tasty.” “Yeaaaahhhh! McDonuts. And you will honor the code. You are not scoundrels. Rascals perhaps…hehehehe. We can wait. Our journey here was long and dangerous, but with friends like the Choonie-Moonies we will live to escape and return to our own world. Thank you my brothers. Let us find this cave and we will settle in until you return.” To Be Continued.   


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Hi Rosie Rumba here with a big thanks to Rock Modo for the time he donates to our foundation. Please stop by his Spotify page and listen to a few tunes. I did, and I'm now a monthly listener. Wishing you all the best during this holiday season.

Rose Rumba 

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